An Ongoing Battle

An Ongoing Battle


So this year has found me  in a very different place to where i was last year, this time last year i had people i talked to about everything, i had people i went out with who shared the same interests and i couldn't go a day without talking to someone..

Now however that isn't my life i can go days without talking to people, i dont feel confident enough to really confide in people around me, this weekends zombie walk was the first event outside of church that Ive been to in months.

Now i love church and going out with people from church and having events and socializing with them i do, but that's not the only part of my life, i have other interests and hobbies that make me who i am, but other people see as me just being Quirky.

And now i keep finding myself in a place where im trying to convince and force people to have the same interests as me, and that's not the person i want to be, i want to have people around me who make videos, i want people around me who take gaming seriously and i want people to talk about anime and manga to.

The problem is none of the amazing people i have around me understand those parts of my life,
so im secluded in my own little "bubble" of fun, which Ive recently been trying to break away from,
trying to force myself to have interests more in line with those around me, and when that fails falling into habits i want to leave in the past.

so whats the solution?

I dont know..

keep playing games, making videos and watching my "Japanese cartoons"?

My plan at the minute is to keep enjoying the things i enjoy, and wait to see if anyone comes along who also enjoys those things..
maybe im just looking for too much and asking for too much.

I will probably go into my interests and how they came to be in future blogs, as so to help people know me a bit better, but for now im just going to carry on doing what i do..

15/09/2014 14:23
written while listening to 'Say you love me - Jessie Ware'